By: Zach Fulwood
I would like to start this post by sending out my deepest condolences to romance because let’s face it, that thing is dead and it doesn’t look like it’s coming back anytime soon.
Truth be told, romance has been dead for a while now. Gone are the days of showing up to a woman’s house with flowers. Gone are the days of wooing a woman and tastefully pursuing her without venturing off into the #metoo movement. I mean, do guys even bring women (other than their mother) flowers anymore?
Now, some of this can be explained because of the presence of social media. Social media has definitely warped the dating game in a way that has lessened the need to feel like romance is necessary. If I can get a woman to interact with me and eventually go out with me simply by liking a few pictures and sending her some Maya Angelou quotes, what do I need flowers and candy for?
Relationships (for those who want them) are so much easier to come by now than before because of the access to social media. It’s because of this that dating has become a thing of convenience. And like everything else in life, when something becomes convenient, we tend to put less effort into it.
It’s as if as a result of everything we want potentially being at our disposal on a phone screen, we forget what to do when that’s not an option and have to resort to a little face to face action. I’m not saying that the art of conversation is completely gone or anything. I’m just saying, people tend to have vastly different personalities in person than over texts.
As we’ve all probably seen by now, those Tinder dates where the chemistry just isn’t there eventually turns into countless others until they ultimately settle to be with someone they could do much better than but are either too afraid or too lazy to try. They settle for late night texts instead of phone calls. They settle for date nights at the mall food court instead of date nights at the harbor. You get the point. People are out here settling for less than what they deserve because the standards for romance and dating have been lowered and that’s unfortunate.
This romance issue is partly on the creation of social media but most of the blame belongs to us. It’s not too much to ask the men out there to seriously court a woman and have her feel like she’s wanted for life and not needed for the moment. Conversely, it’s not too much to ask women to embrace a little romance from a man without looking at him as if he’s less than or trying too hard. Collectively, we’ve gotta do better and it starts with being unwilling to compromise with what we feel we deserve instead of settling for whatever we can find.